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Self Disclosure and Trust

Diposting oleh B A 7 0 E Y di 10:13 AM

Learning Points

How do I:

• Improve my relationships by sharing my thoughts and feelings?

• Learn to trust others, especially when trust has been broken?

• Determine the appropriate amount to disclose to others?

• Use situational cues to guide self-disclose and trust?

• Share my feelings about and reactions to people and situations, in addi­tion to facts?

• Demonstrate that I am worthy of others’ trust? -

Mary Townsend has been on the fast track at the investment finn for which she has worked for five years. She entered graduate school shortly after graduating with honors from an elite university in the northeast. While in graduate school she interned with an investment firm in New York City that was at the time coheaded by John White, a close friend of the family. During her tenure at the firm, she exceeded all performance expectations and rose to the rank of vice president within three years. Now in line for another promotion, her performance has slacked off Her record is inconsistent. One minute she appears to be at the top of her game, the next she is preoccupied and unreliable.

Her immediate supeMsor Jane Montgomery, has tried to talk with Mary about her inconsistent performance, to no avail. Jane, a director in the firm, placed a call to John White. John no longer heads the firm but often serves as a sounding board to senior man­agement on important personnel and client issues in his role as senior partner Jane has requested that John meet with Mary.

After an initial greeting, John praises Mary for her past performance with the finn and then expresses concern over her current performance. Mary responds by revealing that she feels she is in over her head. “Promise not to tell anyone,” she pleads, and begins to discuss numerous personal incidents that are affecting her performance such as the breakup of a long-standing romance, financial problems brought on by overextending her credit, and afalling out with her family over their concerns about her lack of interest in getting married, having children, and settling down.

While sympathetic, John is dismayed at what he learns from Mary about her troubles. He concludes Mary’s personal problems are detracting from her ability to focus on her job. John recommends to Mary’s supervisor that she be let go as soon as a “legitimate”
opponwzlty presents Itse(f One such opportunity Is the upcoming announcemem that due to the growth of online in vestment companies, the finn will be less reliant on the individu­als at Mary ~s leveL

  1. What could Mary have done to minimize the degree to which her personal problems spilled over into work?
  2. Did Mary disclose too much about herself, setting herself up for a negative recommen dation from John? How would you have handled this situation?
  3. Did John overstep his bounds in his conversation with Mary about her performance? What about the promise he made to her?

Self-disclosure is the process of letting others know what you think, feel, and want. It is revealing to another how you are reacting to the situation and sharing experiences that are relevant to that situation.’ By revealing information abont yourself, others with whon you associate are better able to understand what makes you tick—your motivations, fears work style, strengths, and weaknesses. This knowledge helps others to determine strate­gies for working effectively with you. In addition, as you self-disclose, others reciprocate enabling you to better develop strategies for understanding and working effectively with them. To be effective, self-disclosure includes these elements:2

TRUST

 By adding trust to self-disclosure, we are able to complete the relationship equation. The two elements fonn a cycle: the more you trust the more you disclose, and the more you disclose the more you trust. How do we define trust? Trust is a multifaceted concept that captures one’s faith or belief in the integrity or reliability of another person or thing. In business, as in life, trust is an essential building block in developing relationships with customers, colleagues, and business associates. Think of a relationship you’ve had where trust has been broken. Perhaps a promised raise didn’t materialize, a client misrepre­sented his or her financial situation, or a friend informs you that your significant other— who was attending a conference in another state—was seen with someone else. Isn’t it difficult to relate to that person now or believe that person’s promises? Does the lack of trust make you less inclined to make plans or have anything to do with this person?



 

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